Wow! Where do I even begin? As you probably have guessed I have not exactly had much to boast about since my last post. I've had setbacks (mostly medical, some financial) that impeded me from being able to exercise (pulled muscle, a heel sprain & aggravated an old ankle sprain). I also never really recuperated from an Asthma attack I had back in August. Should have seen a doctor but...lack of time & money (mostly money) I chose not to. There was also the little dental emergency I had in November that set me further back financially, something I most definitely needed right before Christmas! Especially, since my GIFTED child still believes in Santa!!! Anyone who like me literally lives from paycheck to paycheck would understand my dilemma, those of you who don't perhaps you once did and those of you who don't and never did, would never understand.
In retrospect, I did manage to pull off a fantastic Potluck Holiday Gathering with my closest of friends. Who have been by my side in good times, as well as in bad times and never judged me or considered me TACKY for hosting a party and asking my guests to bring a dish or refreshments.
I also spent the most wonderful Christmas weekend with my beautiful son and two of the BEST families I have ever known who welcomed us into their homes & made us feel like part of the family.
On Christmas morning, my son's high pitched excitement at the "small" (in comparison to the ginormous pile at his father's) array of presents Santa had left for him made the holiday complete since I felt honored to have the privilege to witness this reaction which someday soon may just be a memory.
The year ended on a High Note with a walk with my son, no agendas or a schedule...it was perfect! Me & my amazing son spent the evening of Dec 30th strolling through NYC. I hate to sound melodramatic but it was magical. We visited the tree at Rockefeller Center, walked along 5th Avenue and ended up the evening in Times Square (we were there on New Year's Eve!). The whole time, he was so observant (in a mature kind of way) and we just talked, walked and spent REAL time with one another. Time that is so precious & is often taken for granted. I hope this becomes an Annual Tradition & that he never grows tired of taking walks with his mom.
So as 2012 begins, I make no resolutions (those often don't get adhered to anyways) but I do make a promise, to myself & my son. I promise to go back to school (so hopefully someday soon I won't have to work paycheck to paycheck anymore), I promise to take the time to enjoy the little things in life & reflect on the positive things that happen in my life and not the negative. Hey! It's life and without hardships or heartaches we wouldn't be able to appreciate the GREAT things in our lives.
In closing, thanks to an Angel (who would like to remain nameless) I was able to renew my online WW membership & although I am still not at 100% (so I cannot exercise) I plan on going forth with my mission to lose weight & get healthy in 2012. Hey, I managed to keep off the 15 pounds I lost even with all of the Holiday indulgences I allowed myself to take and I intend to keep on losing those pounds until I get to my goal!
Monday, January 2, 2012
Monday, November 21, 2011
Whatever I am doing...it's working!
So I am not going to lie, I have had a few setbacks. I hurt myself (so I had to pull back on the exercising & have not been able to get into the same momentum I had). Work has been crazy (no time to count points & I am making really bad choices at time...mostly because of lack of planning). All in all I seem to be doing something right...I take the stairs whenever possible, walk wherever I can & when my head is on straight I behave like an angel. Funny thing is....it's WORKING!!!!
I lost 15 pounds so far, not FANTASTIC but damn that's 15 POUNDS LESS THAN I WAS!!!! Things are also fitting differently & people...men especially are noticing! Yep it seems as though they are coming out of the woodwork, paying me compliments...asking me out! Funny thing is also happening...women are noticing too. I seem to have fallen into their radar as well....sorry ladies but I don't bat for that team (never did & probably never will) Frankly speaking besides the obvious appendage that men have and women don't (and I happen to be fond of)...there is something about broad shoulders that no woman could ever have (no matter how much they pump up)...I just love men! Anyway, sorry to digress.....
Maybe it's my new attitude? Or the fact that I have fallen in love? It seems to appeal to people and make them drawn to me. Yes it is true...I am madly in love & it radiates from my pores. So who is this special someone who makes my heart beat a little faster and puts a pep to my step......it's ME!
It's taken 40+ years but finally I can say that I love myself & who I've become. To hell with those who have hurt me or tried to bring me down. To hell to those who don't value me the way I deserve to be valued...and guess what.....all of my trials and tribulations have only made me STRONGER!
It's been a long time coming but it's finally ALL ABOUT ME so there you have it!
I lost 15 pounds so far, not FANTASTIC but damn that's 15 POUNDS LESS THAN I WAS!!!! Things are also fitting differently & people...men especially are noticing! Yep it seems as though they are coming out of the woodwork, paying me compliments...asking me out! Funny thing is also happening...women are noticing too. I seem to have fallen into their radar as well....sorry ladies but I don't bat for that team (never did & probably never will) Frankly speaking besides the obvious appendage that men have and women don't (and I happen to be fond of)...there is something about broad shoulders that no woman could ever have (no matter how much they pump up)...I just love men! Anyway, sorry to digress.....
Maybe it's my new attitude? Or the fact that I have fallen in love? It seems to appeal to people and make them drawn to me. Yes it is true...I am madly in love & it radiates from my pores. So who is this special someone who makes my heart beat a little faster and puts a pep to my step......it's ME!
It's taken 40+ years but finally I can say that I love myself & who I've become. To hell with those who have hurt me or tried to bring me down. To hell to those who don't value me the way I deserve to be valued...and guess what.....all of my trials and tribulations have only made me STRONGER!
It's been a long time coming but it's finally ALL ABOUT ME so there you have it!
Sunday, October 30, 2011
In Continuation
Hello again! These last couple of weeks have been absolutely insane...at work....at home...in general.
Thankfully, Ryan's last game will be on Friday so no more Fall Baseball. As much as he enjoys to play the sport & I like watching him play....every now and again I get exhausted from being Mommy Chauffeur.
What's really killing my mojo and draining me of what little energy I have left is work. I am not saying I hate my job or the company I work for or anything of the sort. It's just the industry I am in. It's finance, it's dealing with people's money, with their nest egg, with their fears...it's exhausting! Day in and day out I am talking people off ledges, comforting their fears while I see my own 401K tank & the only people who call me on a daily basis are creditors. It's stressful. Listen the economy sucks, you don't need me to tell you that. Frankly, I am not thrilled over this whole Occupy Wall Street movement because since it began my workload has doubled (not complaining, I am just human and could do only so much). I come home from work & all I want to do is collapse on the couch & my brain is absolute mush. Just the other day I stopped at my local supermarket after working a 10 1/2 hour day so that I could pick up a few things for dinner. I was so tired I left my phone there and wasn't until I got home that realized it so I had to go back out to retrieve it. The very next day I worked a 10 hour day and realized when I got to my car that I had left my keys on my desk so I had to go all the way back to get them. I actually never ate dinner on either of these days because I was too tired and just went to bed. Funny thing is, these are days I did not have Ryan, on those days I can't work late but my evenings are just as exhausting & most nights the kid eats and so does the dog...I only have the energy to nibble on something.
The long and the short of all this is...I have not had the energy to write about my daily dieting rituals but that does not mean I am not still giving it an effort. In all honesty, I have not worked out in about two weeks (I hurt my leg and then when it started to heal went on two very long walks, which made me sore for days). I am watching what I eat, and trying to make sensible choices (I keep forgetting to track my points sometimes). The whole eat breakfast like a king and have dinner like a pauper theory seems to be working though. I have a big breakfast and it seems to sustain me through the day and into the evening, In summary since I started my journey I lost 10 pounds. Perhaps it could have been more if I stayed more consistent, but hey the pounds did not add up overnight and they won't come off overnight either....baby steps! But I just have to keep on going.....
,
Thankfully, Ryan's last game will be on Friday so no more Fall Baseball. As much as he enjoys to play the sport & I like watching him play....every now and again I get exhausted from being Mommy Chauffeur.
What's really killing my mojo and draining me of what little energy I have left is work. I am not saying I hate my job or the company I work for or anything of the sort. It's just the industry I am in. It's finance, it's dealing with people's money, with their nest egg, with their fears...it's exhausting! Day in and day out I am talking people off ledges, comforting their fears while I see my own 401K tank & the only people who call me on a daily basis are creditors. It's stressful. Listen the economy sucks, you don't need me to tell you that. Frankly, I am not thrilled over this whole Occupy Wall Street movement because since it began my workload has doubled (not complaining, I am just human and could do only so much). I come home from work & all I want to do is collapse on the couch & my brain is absolute mush. Just the other day I stopped at my local supermarket after working a 10 1/2 hour day so that I could pick up a few things for dinner. I was so tired I left my phone there and wasn't until I got home that realized it so I had to go back out to retrieve it. The very next day I worked a 10 hour day and realized when I got to my car that I had left my keys on my desk so I had to go all the way back to get them. I actually never ate dinner on either of these days because I was too tired and just went to bed. Funny thing is, these are days I did not have Ryan, on those days I can't work late but my evenings are just as exhausting & most nights the kid eats and so does the dog...I only have the energy to nibble on something.
The long and the short of all this is...I have not had the energy to write about my daily dieting rituals but that does not mean I am not still giving it an effort. In all honesty, I have not worked out in about two weeks (I hurt my leg and then when it started to heal went on two very long walks, which made me sore for days). I am watching what I eat, and trying to make sensible choices (I keep forgetting to track my points sometimes). The whole eat breakfast like a king and have dinner like a pauper theory seems to be working though. I have a big breakfast and it seems to sustain me through the day and into the evening, In summary since I started my journey I lost 10 pounds. Perhaps it could have been more if I stayed more consistent, but hey the pounds did not add up overnight and they won't come off overnight either....baby steps! But I just have to keep on going.....
,
Monday, October 17, 2011
Days Twenty-Five through Twenty-Nine: Balls and Other Stuff
Thursday - I attended the North Bergen Mayor's Ball. What a party! There was a bountiful buffet complete with the biggest shrimp I had ever seen in my life, food up the whazoo, drinks a plenty and desserts to die for. Was I good? <Insert loud laughter> Are you kidding me? Of course, I was not good...but I know if I wasn't on this little kick I am on I could have been a lot worse.
Friday - It took me over an hour to get home from work. These things rattle me & hence stress me out...enough said.
Saturday - I had to Proctor in the morning so I was up and about at a ridiculously early hour (6AM). Afterwards I went to the Endodontist & started a root canal. It's going to cost me $925 & the way they work is I pay them and then they bill my Insurance Company (memories of Celebrity all over again). Once they receive the payment from the Insurance Company I will get reimbursed for the amount the Insurance Company paid. Really? $925 right before Christmas, when I am already behind on the majority of my bills...I need this like a hole in the head. Hence more stress! BTW - Stress = Make Poor Food Choices (at least I am aware of this and try to not go too overboard).
Sunday - My MBF (male best friend) came over to flip Ryan's mattress. He has been complaining about his mattress being uncomfortable for months and has been sleeping in my bed but since I am BROKE (see above) I decided it would be best to try to buy myself some time by flipping the thing over and buying Memory Foam to line it with. This is not a job that I can do myself since Ryan has a bunk bed, so my MBF came to the rescue & we got the job done (BTW - Ryan is in his room & LOVES his "new" mattress). Score!
Monday - I woke up feeling as though a Mack Truck had run me over. Never made it to work, so those of you who know me know this is serious. I spent most of the day sleeping or in the bathroom. I did manage to keep my promise to Ryan & went to Party City to get him his Halloween Costume and then came home & let him carve his pumpkin. He did the majority of the work himself, while I lay on the couch praying the pain in my gut would just go away.
In summary, this last week was one of the most chaotic ones I have had in quite sometime. I am a little disappointed in myself because I barely made time to exercise and made some pretty awful food choices. Bad Judy!!!!
However, right now I just can't wait to recoup from the stomach bug that is ailing me at the moment so that I can get back to business, because enough is enough!
Friday - It took me over an hour to get home from work. These things rattle me & hence stress me out...enough said.
Saturday - I had to Proctor in the morning so I was up and about at a ridiculously early hour (6AM). Afterwards I went to the Endodontist & started a root canal. It's going to cost me $925 & the way they work is I pay them and then they bill my Insurance Company (memories of Celebrity all over again). Once they receive the payment from the Insurance Company I will get reimbursed for the amount the Insurance Company paid. Really? $925 right before Christmas, when I am already behind on the majority of my bills...I need this like a hole in the head. Hence more stress! BTW - Stress = Make Poor Food Choices (at least I am aware of this and try to not go too overboard).
Sunday - My MBF (male best friend) came over to flip Ryan's mattress. He has been complaining about his mattress being uncomfortable for months and has been sleeping in my bed but since I am BROKE (see above) I decided it would be best to try to buy myself some time by flipping the thing over and buying Memory Foam to line it with. This is not a job that I can do myself since Ryan has a bunk bed, so my MBF came to the rescue & we got the job done (BTW - Ryan is in his room & LOVES his "new" mattress). Score!
Monday - I woke up feeling as though a Mack Truck had run me over. Never made it to work, so those of you who know me know this is serious. I spent most of the day sleeping or in the bathroom. I did manage to keep my promise to Ryan & went to Party City to get him his Halloween Costume and then came home & let him carve his pumpkin. He did the majority of the work himself, while I lay on the couch praying the pain in my gut would just go away.
In summary, this last week was one of the most chaotic ones I have had in quite sometime. I am a little disappointed in myself because I barely made time to exercise and made some pretty awful food choices. Bad Judy!!!!
However, right now I just can't wait to recoup from the stomach bug that is ailing me at the moment so that I can get back to business, because enough is enough!
Thursday, October 13, 2011
Day Twenty-Four: Happy Hump Day
So I'm a day late and a dollar short. What else is new. I'm still not completely over the hump but putting all things into consideration I was not as bad as I could have been. So I had a bagel for breakfast and munched on some garlic breadsticks all day. I also had a chocolate bar & a Snackwells bar (only healthy thing I ate all day). For dinner I had Wendy's chili and a baked potato.
I was not kidding when I said that when my "friend" is in for a visit, not only does she completely wipe me out as of late (I was in bed by 10:30....which is unheard of for me) but I crave the strangest things. Trust me I know I shouldn't eat this way....I'm not stupid but when my "friend" is in town, I cave....for the sake of my own sanity. Oh yeah & work has been CRAZY lately, not that I am complaining. I am glad to have a job & I like what I do these days but all week I have been leaving there feeling like mush, too much to do and not enough time to do it.
Still not exercising, I feel as though I am not resting at night & wake up exhausted. Last night to add insult to my already aching leg (I think I may need to see a doctor since my left leg is still feeling sore after almost a WEEK) I got a Charly Horse in the middle of the night, which is still throbbing and making my leg feel worse.
In summary I guess you can say I at least made a "decent" choice at Wendy's for dinner. That's progress. I just have to keep reminding myself....baby steps, baby steps.......
I was not kidding when I said that when my "friend" is in for a visit, not only does she completely wipe me out as of late (I was in bed by 10:30....which is unheard of for me) but I crave the strangest things. Trust me I know I shouldn't eat this way....I'm not stupid but when my "friend" is in town, I cave....for the sake of my own sanity. Oh yeah & work has been CRAZY lately, not that I am complaining. I am glad to have a job & I like what I do these days but all week I have been leaving there feeling like mush, too much to do and not enough time to do it.
Still not exercising, I feel as though I am not resting at night & wake up exhausted. Last night to add insult to my already aching leg (I think I may need to see a doctor since my left leg is still feeling sore after almost a WEEK) I got a Charly Horse in the middle of the night, which is still throbbing and making my leg feel worse.
In summary I guess you can say I at least made a "decent" choice at Wendy's for dinner. That's progress. I just have to keep reminding myself....baby steps, baby steps.......
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Day Twenty-Three: Crow
Maybe if I was forced to eat crow unless I stick to my diet, this would work! Well I am kinda eating crow right about now. I honestly don't know what's wrong with me? The day starts off good (not perfect, Ryan asked for spaghetti o's for lunch & a little bit did not fit in the Thermos....you know the rest). From there I get frazzled (my computer at work knocked me out of the server, so my afternoon was shot!) and I lose my motivation. WTF? I did have lots and lots of fruit today, hoping it would quench the bottomless pit....it only made me go to the bathroom 20 thousand times! So in a way, I guess there is a method to my madness.
As an aside, what is it with electronics conspiring against me lately...I know you are all in cahoots...KNOCK IT OFF!!!
I am also not feeling 100% & my exercise room has been taken over by a drying rack (Ryan has a game tomorrow & I had to wash his uniform but was afraid to leave the dryer on all night).
So in summary, I already know this is going to be a challenging week. Too much to do but I am determined that even on not so perfect days I will do my best to at least make a conscious effort at keeping to the plan.
Slow and steady, right? Hey on a good note I am beginning to see things are getting looser on me. Too bad it's my watch, lol. Geesh, you know not for nothing but my wrists were not in such a dire need to get trim. Perhaps we can work on my big fat ASS, now that's more like it!
As an aside, what is it with electronics conspiring against me lately...I know you are all in cahoots...KNOCK IT OFF!!!
I am also not feeling 100% & my exercise room has been taken over by a drying rack (Ryan has a game tomorrow & I had to wash his uniform but was afraid to leave the dryer on all night).
So in summary, I already know this is going to be a challenging week. Too much to do but I am determined that even on not so perfect days I will do my best to at least make a conscious effort at keeping to the plan.
Slow and steady, right? Hey on a good note I am beginning to see things are getting looser on me. Too bad it's my watch, lol. Geesh, you know not for nothing but my wrists were not in such a dire need to get trim. Perhaps we can work on my big fat ASS, now that's more like it!
Monday, October 10, 2011
Days Fifteen through Twenty-Two: 3rd Weekend Recap
You must be wondering where I have been? If I gave up on this whole transformation thing. The answer is No but I did have a terrible week.
My internet froze up, completely! To the point I had to buy some software called "System Mechanic" and when all else failed had to resort to reach out to the devil...my ex-husband (who happens to be a computer expert) for help. Needless to say I could not post anything since my only internet resources were from work (out of the question, too much to do) and my phone (are you kidding me?).
To add insult to injury (no pun intended) I seem to have pulled something in my leg so I could not do my weekly Zumba class and the slightest bit of movement (eg, walking) was painful so I basically could not do any cardio at all. I did work on my strength building and toning but I have to be honest with you, gave up on that on Thursday.
One could say I lost my mojo! Hey I am being honest!!!! I felt like the mole in whack a mole, every time I tried to pop my head out of the hole in the ground, something or someone was waiting on the other side with a huge mallet to knock me back down! It was extremely frustrating and disheartening to say the least. Oh and the icing to the cake is I am PMSing, so I am EXTRA sensitive to EVERYTHING!!!!
So considering my mood and in the sake for humanity (especially those I interact with on a daily basis) I decided to give myself a break. A break from the exercise and the point counting. I enjoyed a three day free for all (in moderation, since for some reason although I knew I was not doing what I should be doing somewhere my sub-conscious was saying...ah ah ah BAD JUDY!)
Sunday was the worst day! I went pumpkin picking with my son Ryan and our friends Jamie and Jake. I knew enough to have only ONE apple cider donut, but could not pass on the Fried Oreos (those things are EVIL) and my son insisted on Funnel Cake which of course I finished because I hate seeing food (even food that is bad for me) go to waste. For the record, it's impossible to stay on track when your kids are around. Well maybe not impossible but it sure seems like it, since I tend to act like a freakin' garbage disposal around him...finishing off what he leaves behind. That is one habit I am going to need to learn to nip in the butt if I ever plan on reaching my goal.
Overall, bad week (it happens) but not too much damage was done. I only gained 1.6 pounds so I am still ahead of the game. This week I have to focus and not let my monthly visitor hinder my progress by turning me into an eating machine. I just have to remind myself, it is not going to happen overnight....baby steps all the way and it's ok to screw up (I'M HUMAN). I just have to learn to get back on the wagon when I fall off and most importantly I need to be honest with myself, if this is EVER going to work!
My internet froze up, completely! To the point I had to buy some software called "System Mechanic" and when all else failed had to resort to reach out to the devil...my ex-husband (who happens to be a computer expert) for help. Needless to say I could not post anything since my only internet resources were from work (out of the question, too much to do) and my phone (are you kidding me?).
To add insult to injury (no pun intended) I seem to have pulled something in my leg so I could not do my weekly Zumba class and the slightest bit of movement (eg, walking) was painful so I basically could not do any cardio at all. I did work on my strength building and toning but I have to be honest with you, gave up on that on Thursday.
One could say I lost my mojo! Hey I am being honest!!!! I felt like the mole in whack a mole, every time I tried to pop my head out of the hole in the ground, something or someone was waiting on the other side with a huge mallet to knock me back down! It was extremely frustrating and disheartening to say the least. Oh and the icing to the cake is I am PMSing, so I am EXTRA sensitive to EVERYTHING!!!!
So considering my mood and in the sake for humanity (especially those I interact with on a daily basis) I decided to give myself a break. A break from the exercise and the point counting. I enjoyed a three day free for all (in moderation, since for some reason although I knew I was not doing what I should be doing somewhere my sub-conscious was saying...ah ah ah BAD JUDY!)
Sunday was the worst day! I went pumpkin picking with my son Ryan and our friends Jamie and Jake. I knew enough to have only ONE apple cider donut, but could not pass on the Fried Oreos (those things are EVIL) and my son insisted on Funnel Cake which of course I finished because I hate seeing food (even food that is bad for me) go to waste. For the record, it's impossible to stay on track when your kids are around. Well maybe not impossible but it sure seems like it, since I tend to act like a freakin' garbage disposal around him...finishing off what he leaves behind. That is one habit I am going to need to learn to nip in the butt if I ever plan on reaching my goal.
Overall, bad week (it happens) but not too much damage was done. I only gained 1.6 pounds so I am still ahead of the game. This week I have to focus and not let my monthly visitor hinder my progress by turning me into an eating machine. I just have to remind myself, it is not going to happen overnight....baby steps all the way and it's ok to screw up (I'M HUMAN). I just have to learn to get back on the wagon when I fall off and most importantly I need to be honest with myself, if this is EVER going to work!
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